motivate me pls

It has been 5 weeks and i dont see any sign improvement from my students. Maybe it's way too early to judge but i could have at least grabbed their attention during my lesson. I'm honestly frustrated with myself for not able to perform well. The teachers of SMK abdul Jalil were right. the 'drama' i had when i was doing my practical was only a tip of an iceberg. I am officially shocked by the frightening truth.

I have been trying a lot of methods to educate but it seems like none works on them. I'm so scared thinking about 2 of my classes would be having their exam soon and they are unprepared for it. I've seen a lot of different attitudes. in one way or another, the attitudes dont give them any advantage in life. such a waste of time. At times, i felt like scolding them but i don't think it works.

still so blur....

from a land far, far away....

I'm now in a land so far away from home. I'm currently working in Lawas, Sarawak, around few hundreds kilometers from home. It's so far that some might not even notice the existence of this place. But i love it here. It's very near to 3 places of interests namely Sabah, Labuan and Brunei. Apart, there are a lot of beautiful waterfall and recreation places here. Not forgetting, there are also several breath taking beaches and scenery. Nature lovers would really love to be here as it is still so green and not very much polluted by the development.

Anyway, i'm doing fine now. it's been a month and i'm adjusting well. i arrived here on the 22nd July and now it's now 22August, perfectly a month. Like i said earlier, i'm adjusting and it seems like everything is going as planned. I was, however, hoping for few things that Lawas can't offer but i think it's better than nothing. You can get almost everything easily here.

It's been two years in a row that i have to celebrate most of my Ramadhan days without family. Fortunately, i'l be back with them for Raya or i would be sad on that day. I spent last Raya with my adopted family in Melaka, so i have to celebrate the coming Raya with my family. I miss the kampung raya environment.

Alahamdulillah, this Raya might be a little different as i'm celebrating as a person who is employed. For the past 22 years, i've been celebrating it as a student. Now, i've come a a brand new phase of my life. For a start, i'll be paying my own zakat this year. Everything is so new to me. I have lots of new responsibilities in which i never even care about when i were a student. Everything would be arranged by my uncle who is also my mother and father at the same time. He means the world to me.

If i got my paid this month, i would be buying few things for Raya. Here are the list:
1. Cakes (3 layered cakes)
2. Paint (maybe)
3. new Raya clothes
4. some goodies for my nieces and nephews.

Wishing all my readers happy Ramadhan :)